Our bozo report this morning comes from Portland, Oregon, where they have a bike theft problem. A BIG bike theft problem, apparently. So big that the Portland police department has a special Bike Theft Task Force. One of the officers, who ride bikes themselves, parked his bike in front of the Multnomah County Courthouse and, since he had forgotten his U-Lock, used his handcuffs to secure the bike to the rack. Bad idea. When he returned an hour and a half later, he found his bike gone and the handcuffs dangling from the bike rack. Oops. Anyone spotting a blue bike with a “Police” logo on the side is asked to contact the police department.